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Coping with the demands of a Premature Baby and Family Life
If you happen to be discharged before your baby, you may find it
quite difficult to schedule your life accordingly. Most of your time
will be taken up by hospital visits, expressing milk and feeding,
which will leave minimal time to spend with your partner and the
rest of your family. This can weigh heavily on the new mother, who
is feeling naturally low after the birth and distressed at the
thought of having to be separated from her baby. These feelings if
left untreated, can result in severe postnatal depression, with the
mother viewing her baby as an object in a glass cage rather than the
little person conceived out of marital love.
Partners will also feel immensely drained at the thought of having
to share 'their' time, to care for a sick, underweight baby,
especially when it is clear that there is little they can personally
offer. This need not become too much of a problem, if you openly
discuss your feelings right from the beginning, giving each other
plenty of emotional support and involving your partner as much as
possible.
In the case of there being other children, it may be very difficult
not to neglect them, although this is definitely unintentional, they
will probably have difficulty understanding why the new baby is
gaining so much of your attention. Try to let them visit the baby in
the hospital, and gently explain why it is that their new
brother/sister has to remain in hospital care. Involving them right
in the beginning is a very important step for family acceptance,
which may otherwise create problems when the baby is discharged.
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